Talk about one heck of a month!

July has been such a crazy, crazy month that I'm glad it's over!

The domino effect of my mother-in-law up and leaving the family at the end of June continued into July (yeah okay, she left her husband, but since she made the choice to up and leave with no notice to any of her kids and has been residing down in Florida ever since with little to no contact aside from stalking us on Facebook, yeah, she left us all as well).

My little sister-in-law and I barely avoided what could have a been a major and possibly deadly accident when the entire wheel of my dad's SUV flew off the car on I-90 after we went into the suburbs to hand off their puppies that they couldn't continue to take care since my mother-in-law had left. We moved my sister-in-law and father-in-law into our house indefinitely until they can get their property out in the country sold and smaller purchase a house here in town. Because of this, we've had to move Jay's crib and changing table/dresser into our room so my father-in-law has a room on the main floor to stay in. Jay keeps waking us up early because my father-in-law keeps waking him up early in the morning. It kinda sucks, although since Jay's been getting used to waking up early, he did wake Grandpa up early, babbling and carrying on, a few mornings lol... it also drives me nuts as they have a bad habit of leaving trash and used dishes all over the house. They seem to be doing better, but still... my little sister-in-law has been making an effort to help pick up and clean around the house though, which has been nice!

We took a mini family overnight vacation up to Madison, Wisconsin where we visited some fun local restaurants and took Jay to the free Henry Vilas Zoo where he enjoyed seeing the monkeys, tiger, giraffes and bears! He also got to ride a carousel for the first time and he LOVED it! It was a nice little getaway!

Jay's starting to hit the "Terrible Twos" early we think, as he's been throwing some epic(ly funny!) tantrums lately over the dumbest stuff! He had a complete meltdown when we refused to change the DVD he was watching every 5 minutes - throwing himself down on a pillow on the floor, kicking and screaming, among other hilarious tantrums. He'll be working a puzzle and get frustrated and scream and throw the puzzle piece across the room.

He's still not talking much, but his non-verbal communication is crazy good - he wanted his water bottle filled today so he walked over to hubby, took his hand off the computer mouse and handed him his empty water bottle! He's also learned how to shake his head no, so if you show and ask him about something he can tell you 'no' if he doesn't want it. He has this weird habit now though where if he's thirsty and wants a drink but his mouth is full he'll spit the mouthful of food out just to drink from a straw! Kind of annoying...

He's also starting to climb, as he can get himself up on the couch now and he's been getting a bit more adventurous at the playground these days!

Last week we visited my sister out at her place in Waukegan and we spent the afternoon at the Gurnee Mills outlet mall. Jay made out like a bandit - we got several books for $10 that normally would have cost us at least $30 at Barnes and Noble, and he got several long sleeve shirts for fall as well as a new pair of play sneakers at Stride Rite where they measured his feet and he's grown an entire shoe size since last spring (he was measuring a 4.5w and he's now a 5.5w). We had our employee sale this past weekend at work too so Jay's pretty set on clothes for fall - he just needs a pair of overalls my mom said she'd get him as well as a new Thomas hoodie that we're trying to find online as he loved the one he had last spring but it only goes up to 24 months so he's on the verge of out growing it.

In other news, hubby got fired from his day job Monday. It was complete BS too - the reason he was fired for was because they said he wasn't doing tasks he should have been... however he was NEVER told about these tasks nor were they ever sent to him in a memo or in writing or anything so he had no idea that he should have been doing these things they say he should have been - they were never even in his job description! How does that work? We're sure there has to be some ulterior motive for firing him and that this was just the cover excuse... we're expecting them to call him back and renegotiate his return in a matter of weeks - the job really requires 2 people to do all the work he was doing, but since he's awesome at multi-tasking he could do it. The guy they're dumping it on, well, he can barely manage his own job let alone hubby's entire position! They're screwed! Unfortunately this job paid almost twice as much as hubby's part-time supervisor job at UPS, but at least it was the job he hated and was eventually going to quit when he got a full-time position at UPS, and it wasn't the job that our healthcare benefits are through either, so that's good.

In the meantime, I'm picking up extra hours at work while hubby tries to find anything else during the day. My boss is thrilled - she was a little concerned when I walked in Monday afternoon and told her we needed to talk, but I assured her that it was good for her, despite being sucky for me. We recently had the 2 other girls who had been there 2nd longest after me quit recently so there's plenty of hours for me to pick up right now and my boss loooooves me, mainly cuz I'm the most seasoned employee she has left not to mention I know what I'm doing and don't need to be micro-managed. I went from having 10 hours this week to at least 30. My boss declared today that I'm now their unofficial full-time associate. Hubby thinks we'll be okay for awhile - he had some money stashed away "just in case" so if hubby doesn't find something soon we won't really feel the hit for at least a month or 2.

And as if the last few days of July couldn't get any worse...

I came home from a late night at work Monday to my mom calmly telling me she thought everything was now "under control" and continued to inform me that while she went in the kitchen to get Jay's bowl of bedtime yogurt, he had climbed up on the couch (something new he can do now as well) and pulled down a baggie that had some allergy pills in a bottle with a faulty lid that was on the ledge above the back of the couch and they had spilled all over the couch cushion. By the time she heard and came running, Jay was sitting there with the pills, making a face. She did a swoop of his mouth and didn't get anything out so she cleaned them all up asap and called poison control. We think he might have swallowed 1 or 2, which the poison control guy said wouldn't hurt him, but said to keep him up for an hour and a half and monitor him, saying to watch for excitability/bouncing off the walls energy or extreme drowsiness. He did get a burst of hyperness and then he started getting sleepy near the end of the waiting period (which was an hour and a half past bedtime). The poison control guy said he sounded like he was going to be okay and said we could put him to bed and just let him sleep. He slept in til 1pm, but it's no surprise as I had to keep him up til 1230am! I was furious though - it's one thing for my father-in-law to leave his trash and dirty dishes all over my house (although Jay did knock one of his empty glasses on the floor, breaking it in pieces and being shocked at the cause and effect), but it's another entirely serious matter when medication is left within Jay's reach. As it is, my mom has to refinish my wood kitchen table I inherited from my grandma - they left a bottle of rubbing alcohol just sitting on the table, with residue that had leaked down the side of the bottle and underneath it ><

Bring it, August!

Words Can't Describe...

I know it was like a week ago, but last Thursday night, during a midnight showing of the new Christopher Nolan Batman movie, 12 people were killed while 50 were injured when a man opened fire inside the movie theater!

I just... there's no words for that. It's just sad. People go to the movies to escape reality for a few hours and enjoy the entertainment onscreen before them. No one thinks something like this is going to happen! I know first hand, having worked/managed a theater for a few years, working many midnight special premieres like this for blockbuster movies, I never thought of something happening like this there!

Reports say that witnesses said someone, whom now is assumed to be the shooter, exited through the theater's side emergency exit door appearing to take a call early on in the movie and then the shooter came through the door not too long later, so obviously it was propped open.

My mom heard on the news today that someone is putting a lawsuit out against the theater, the film studio and the doctor that had been treating the shooter prior to the incident.

I can definitely see stricter policies and procedures for the theaters from now on.

When I worked there, our ushers were supposed to be doing "theater checks" every 15-30 minutes and the theater checks included checking that the exit doors were shut tight, that the sound and picture on screen were of acceptable quality, and looking for unruly patrons in the theater doing things they shouldn't be. I know though, that often times we had to remind ushers to do these checks and that some of them "half-assed" the checks.

I can see these being much, much stricter now as those emergency exit doors are supposed to be shut tight for a reason - they don't open from the outside and they swing outward so it's not like someone can kick it in.

I read somewhere that the movie started at 12:15am and calls about the shooting came in at about 12:38am. Should a theater check have been done during that time? Possibly... I know at our later shows we'd dismiss the ushers after they did one final theater check.

I'm not trying to point blame, but as a former movie theater employee of several years, it does make me wonder.

I feel horrible for all those families of the victims though! And the community... having been part of a community affected by a major shooting, I know what's that like and it's not pleasant at all. Let's be sure to continue to keep them in our thoughts and prayers!

No, my child's not tired, he just has shiners

I hate when people make assumptions about your child.

Ever since Jay was born and we'd go places in public if he fussed while in the check-out line there always seemed to be someone that would declare "Oh, he must be hungry!" Um, no... he ate before we came here - he probably just wants up, or something to play with, etc.

It got old.

Now that he's a bit older when we go out in places someone almost always comments "Someone looks sleepy - it must be naptime, isn't it?" No, actually he just woke up shortly before we left home.

The reason why people make this assumption?

You can kinda see them here - they look like darker
bags/circles under his eyes

He has what his pediatrician informed us at his last check-up is called "Allergic Shiners," which look like dark circles under the eyes.

This is pretty common in younger kids, especially around allergy season. And we're almost positive that Jay unfortunately inherited my family's horrible seasonal allergies as I notice he tends to show allergy symptoms during the same time we're all struggling with ours - some days being more miserable than others. While we could get testing done to be 100% sure, I just didn't see the point, as there's not much we can do for it right now anyway. There's really only Benadryl unless we want to get a prescription and I'd rather not be giving him Benadryl unless it's really bad.

So yeah. No, my child is not tired when we're out shopping - I try to make sure he's well rested and has a full tummy before we go out anywhere to avoid a tantrum from happening - he just has allergies, thank you very much.

PSA: Don't Forget to Say Thanks!

Thank you.

It's a simple, 2 word phrase yet people often forget to say it.

Maybe it's the way I was raised, but I was taught to send thank you notes to people, especially if they gave you a gift. Now I understand, people get busy and don't always get around to them, sometimes it gets to be so past overdue they just didn't see point after so long and I get that so I've come not to expect them despite still sending them out myself.

And of course if you're at a shower or party and you open the gift in front the person, I would hope you would say thank you on the spot. Sure, a follow-up thank you note is a nice gesture, but you did already thank the person in person so if you did forget or didn't get around to it in time, it's obviously not the end of the world.

What does irritate me is when you don't give the person the gift in person and you never hear anything from them - no note, no email, no phone call, nada. This has happened to me numerous times and I hate being left wondering if the person I intended the gift for actually got it. Say you attend a wedding and leave your gift on a gift table - if you don't get a note or anything from the couple how do you know they got your gift and it didn't get swiped? Or if you mail someone a gift - if you don't hear anything about it, you're left wondering if it got lost in the mail!

I understand, not everyone has the time to write out a thank you note (and even sometimes, depending on the person or the gift, coming up with something thoughtful to say can be tough!) not to mention the price of postage keeps going up every month it seems, but please remember to still say thank you some way, especially if you didn't receive the gift in person. It takes a matter of seconds to write on someone's Facebook wall or send them a text or an email letting them know you at least received their gift and thank them for it.

What are your thoughts? 

Do you still send thank you notes?

Bullying. It NEEDS to stop!

I was bullied in junior high and high school. And if you've been reading for awhile, you know I went to a private Christian school from kindergarten all throughout high school.

Jr. High... there was no one incident that particularly comes to mind but I do remember crying. A lot. Kids were mean to each other left and right for no apparent reason. If you weren't popular you got picked on just because. Either you weren't wearing the right name brand. You had glasses. You didn't know how to correctly apply your make-up (I got teased for make-up lines quite a bit, so much so I didn't wear make-up for years). Anything kids could make fun of you for, they did. It got so bad I did think of suicide at times, even trying to suffocate myself with a pillow once. I often prayed at night for God to just take me in my sleep.

High school... it seemed a lot of the jerks left and went elsewhere by the time Jr. High was over, but the school still had its cliques. While our class got smaller, so did my ally of friends as many when off to other schools. My freshman year, I really only had one friend close friend at school and even she wasn't that great of a friend at times. We had been mutual friends in junior high - my best friend was also her best friend so when our best friend went else where for the 1st half of high school, we were kind of left with each other. She was also the shortest person in our class so obviously she got teased a lot for that.

There were 2 boys in particular that bullied and harassed us the most during our freshman year. She had a crush on one of them (why I'll never know, as he was always a jerk to us), so they teased her about that too. And since I was her friend, when she wasn't around for them to torment, they would torment me instead. And what sucked is that her and them all had last names starting with 'W' and mine a 'Y' so since assigning seats alphabetically was easier for the teachers, we always got stuck sitting in the same area of the room together. An entire semester went by with me constantly pulling spit wads and boogers out of my hair among other crap they'd throw in it while sitting behind me, constantly have them whispering mean comments to me during class, constantly kicking the underneath of my chair during class, distracting me or purposely knocking my books and papers onto the floor. They would steal pens and other supplies and personal items out of our backpacks.

Granted, my friend got it worse than me, although most of this would happen during class and the teachers would be completely oblivious to it, only saying when one of us would scream or yell out at them to stop, and even then, we'd get in trouble for disrupting class and the boys would laugh and continue to torment us when the teacher wasn't looking.

We eventually got sick of it and I had the brilliant idea to wrote an anonymous note to the school administrator addressing everything that had been happening to us with these 2 boys and we signed it "2 concerned students". Why anonymous? Simple logic really - if they knew it was us that tattled on them, they'd harass us and bully us even more.

The administrator got our letter and addressed the issue, suspending both boys with an ISS (in school suspension) and made them write us apology letters saying it would stop. I was relieved. My friend though, having a crush on one of them (again, I still have no idea why), felt bad that they got in so much trouble and wrote him and apology letter back, sticking it in his locker so he'd get it at the end of the day.

The next morning we were called into the office and questioned about her letter. I had told her not to do it, but what do I know. The administrator felt he was taken for a fool by her. And he had branded me a liar as when it came up where my mother was (as we were neighbors with the man and my family had known him for years) I told him she was at Bible Study that morning. It was a Wednesday, Bible Study is on Thursday, but what he failed to realize, ask or bother to let me explain is that my mom was on the leadership team, which has meetings on Wednesday morning to go over the lesson plan for the next day. But again, he didn't bother to ask me to clarify, he just thought I was lying. And sent us both to ISS, violating his own policy handbook for the school he had written which states a student's parents would be called before a student was suspended. And we were forced to write apology letters to our tormentors AND their families. I completely half-assed my letters, as I didn't even know why I was there or what I was apologizing for. At one point I was tempted to apologized that their sons were such horrible rotten kids but I knew that wouldn't help my case any.

Needless to say, mom picked me up from school, I told her everything in the car, she called the school as soon as we got home, furious with them for what happened and them not notifying her and we had a meeting with the administrator the next morning before school. He admitted he overreacted and should have let me explain. It got scratched off my record and THANK GOD for the rest of high school those boys never talked to me again. The next 3 years our lockers weren't next to each other, I wasn't in the same room with them... the rest of the semester the teachers finally got a clue and moved our desks to opposite sides of the room. It stopped with them.

The rest of high school was pretty easy, aside from the occasional girl drama among friends, by the time I was a senior I had a solid group of friends to hang with so ignoring the people that were mean was easier, and I was the editor-in-chief of the newspaper and people were kissing up to me just to get their name or picture into it. I was quite amused!

So... what's the point of me sharing my story?

Well, this week a young girl at my former high school killed herself.

My sister knew her - they had done trampoline at one of the local gyms together for at least 4 years and my sis considered her to be like a younger sister back then. While they were in high school together last year, there's a 3 grade difference between them so they didn't interact a whole lot, aside from a "hi how are you?" here and there in the hallway. Sadly, my sis does recall there were some nasty, mean rumors going around the school about the girl last year.

My sis herself was the victim of some nasty, mean rumors as well and was labeled a slut and a whore by various popular girls and boys all because some of her friends were guys - it only escalated last year when she befriended a student who was homeschooled but attended the school for 2 classes so he could play football. They were nothing more than friends - my sis was seeing her now-husband by then - but she wasn't popular and he was a football player and yeah... how dare that be allowed! Kids were spreading rumors that she was selling herself down on 7th Street (the known area in town where the hookers are) for lunch money too - I remember my sis staying home from school the rest of the week waiting for that rumor to stop.

And we're not the only ones to have been bullied and tormented there in a "Christian" school. Honestly, all the alumni I'm in touch with still, all look back and talk about how much they hated their time there. How it was the worst time they ever experienced. Some had it worse than others, some I had no idea went through similar torments like I did - it just goes to show, you never fully known what's going on with those around you - it's easy to put on a happy face and fake how you really feel when you have to.

The problem is, the school fails to acknowledge and accept there's a problem. That this crap happens there, in their Christian school. And it's been going on for years. I know I'm not the 1st kid to get bullied and tormented while there. I know there were plenty others. The administrator that was there that somewhat dealt with my problem, that was his last year. The current administrator, until this week, has flat out said this stuff doesn't happen there - I know this for a fact as I know parents and alumni (I myself have expressed concerns to various current staff members and even written emails) and even faculty have tried to bring this to his attention, with him refusing to accept, acknowledge or believe it! I know for a fact he was told a year ago that mean, vicious rumors were being spread about students, that good Christian students were being bullied in his Christian school for simply trying to be good Christian kids and that it was only a matter of time until something tragic happened if wasn't taken more seriously. Sadly, that something tragic happened this week. And I really hope to God it's an eye-opener to him as this could have been prevented had he listened instead of being ignorant.

I mean no disrespect for the girl's family and true friends (and I honestly wonder how many of her tormentors are now playing the sympathy card rather than acknowledge that they were part of what drove her to do what she did) - if anything I'm upset and furious FOR them at the school's lack of preventing it, as I said, the bullying problem is something that's been ongoing there for years but was refused to be dealt with when parents and others brought it to attention. I was told on Facebook tonight I was out of line and disrespectful for blaming the school the way I did. But the truth is, as others that backed me up have said, it needs to be addressed. If not now, when? We don't want or need more kids killing themselves while the school continues to deny the fact that there is a problem.


Yes, I'm aware that private Christian schools really are no different than public school aside from the uniforms, Bible classes and weekly chapel services. However when you're spending thousands of dollars a year on tuition to send your child there, you're expecting them to have a better, safer experience than they would in the public schools. You're expecting they wouldn't have to deal with the crap and be exposed to certain things on the same level as you would in a public school. When you pay that much money, you expect to get your money's worth.

And when you have Christian kids being bullied in a Christian school for trying to be good Christian kids, there's obviously a problem. And it needs to be addressed. And it's just sad that this had to happen.

 

I hugged Jay extra tight tonight. And while he's too little to understand and not quite used to concepts of "play nice" and "sharing" yet, I told him that if anyone is ever mean to him that he can always come to mommy and daddy and we'll find a way to take care of it. And if he ever is a bully, well, you can bet your buttons there will be action taken to put a stop to it.

Were you ever bullied as a kid or teenager? 

Have you personally been affect by something like this?

What I've Learn About Myself in Regards to Politics

If the political talk of the past few months has made me realize anything it's this:

1) The Right and the Left are one in the same - they're just as bad as the other and rather than work together they'd rather bicker and fight and slam each other, accomplishing nothing. The extremists on the Right, while they get more publicity these days, really are just as crazy as the extremists on the Left.

2) I'm a conservative moderate.

Growing up, I was raised in a conservative home. I was brought up Christian, attending youth group Wednesday night, Sunday school and service on Sunday mornings and small group in high school on Sunday nights, I also went to a smaller private Christian school from kindergarten through high school. Democrats were "the bad guys" and the Independent party was a joke. I always considered myself Republican by default, but I did lean more towards the middle of the political spectrum.

You know things have gone crazy in the GOP when Ron Paul is the only candidate that seems to make any sense. And he's not even really a Republican - he's a Libertarian.

And yes, this time around, I'm supporting Ron Paul.

Call me crazy, but he's the only candidate I feel that really seems to get it.

The "real" Right is too busy fighting gay marriage (which, regardless your feelings on the topic, I think it's a lost battle - whether you like it or not, it's going to happen) and now this ridiculous "War on Women" (being anti-abortion in most cases, I get the reasoning behind the mandatory ultrasound, however the rest of what I've read, especially in regards to birth control... are they trying to piss off most women? Even the conservative ones?)

Yes, some people have issues with his policies - mostly his foreign policy ideas - but being that there's 3 branches of government that are supposed to keep each other in line via checks and balances, I don't see it being a huge issue to worry about.

People aren't crazy about his saying to cut military funding... but yet the military backs him up and is in favor of him...? If the military doesn't have an issue with it then why should we?

And I'm obviously pro-Israel, but I do agree that we should pull out and let her take care of herself for a bit, only stepping in if needed. And same goes for everywhere else we have troops that we really shouldn't. Help our allies when they need it, but let them do their own thing in the meantime.

He's against SOPA and all the other SOPA-like bills congress keeps trying to sneak past people when it comes to internet censorship.

I love how he's for state's rights and letting the state's decide what's best for them... kinda like how things were once upon a time! 

And I know people are all "but he's for marijuana legalization, prostitution, gay marriage!" Read people. He said he feels those issues should be determined at the state level, meaning let the states decide for themselves. Gay marriage, like I said, it's a losing battle to try and fight it when you really get down to it. And I honestly don't have a problem with the legalization of marijuana - I've never used it, but I see it being like alcohol when it was once again legalized after prohibition. Crime regarding it went down and we didn't have the jails crowded with people who were in them solely because of it, and hello - they can tax the hell out of it, helping the debt a little bit! Sure, some people will try it because it's legalized, but not everyone's going to start toking up just because it's legal - there's lots of people that don't smoke cigarettes because of the health risks and not everyone drinks either.

And personally, I love how when it comes to the topic of abortion, he's an OB/GYN. His account of a late term abortion he witnessed by an instructor during his residency is quite sad and puts late term abortions a bit more in perspective - at that late in a pregnancy the fetus (a term I hate to use) is clearly a baby. While he does believe legalizing or banning abortion should also be up to the states to decide for themselves, I get the impression he has the same view as I do (abortion only allowed in the cases of rape or life/death situation with the mother, such as South Dakota's proposed Measure 11 back in 2008).

Romney seems to flip-flop too much, depending on what crowd he's trying to draw support from, and the Rick's... they're just too extreme. And while I understand where them and even Bachmann are coming from with their ideas and stances, pissing off everyone except the super conservative right is NOT going to win you an election. And Newt... I'm sorry but he if his personal life speaks anything about his character, the guy's a jerk with no morals.

Ron Paul is really the only candidate that has a chance against Obama - the Right will get behind him because he's not Obama while the moderates like myself like what he stands for and he can possibly sway those on the Left or the indifferent who aren't Obama fans either without feeling like they're voting for someone they can't agree with on the issues. Plus, it's no secret, he's the only candidate that seems to know what's in the constitution - if you've seen any clips from the debates, all the other candidates turn to Ron Paul when a constitution question is asked.

And honestly, at this point, I can't bring myself to vote for any of the other candidates - I'll write him in (if he's not the 3rd party candidate) if I have to.

While Romney seems to be the current front-runner, really, there's no telling at this point as none of the candidates have nearly enough delegates to get the bid - we're still more than 4 months away from the convention. I'm really like the idea of a Brokered Convention... it is a bit suspicious how Ron Paul seems to have the biggest turn outs and following and "likes" around the internet, yet the media keeps throwing the likes of Romney down our throats.

And reading up on Brokered Conventions, I came across this post which quite nicely puts what I've been saying all along:

"Of the four candidates [Romney, Santorum, Paul and Gingrich], only Ron Paul balances the budget, only Ron Paul wants to stop the war-mongering, only Ron Paul does not alienate the majority of women, only Ron Paul can ignite a fire in independents, and independents (not the radical right), are the key to this election.
Republicans are not going to vote for Obama so appealing to the far right makes little sense in terms of an overall strategy. Moreover, independents are likely horrified by the war-mongering and misguided statements on religious and social issues of all the candidates but Paul.
If Republicans lose this election, it will be because they all outdid each other in foolish attempts to appeal to the far right on issues where a huge majority of the population of the US is in the middle."

VERY insensitive treatment by Walmart to a cancer fighter

My aunt shared this on Facebook the other night and I re-shared it as well and thought I would post it here to help raise awareness.

If anyone from Walmart stumbles across this, this occurred at Walmart #1490 in Rockford, IL on Walton St.

Audra is a good friend of my aunt's whom she's known for a really long time and throughout the years Audra has been doing up-dos for me and my sis for various formal occasions. She's been fighting breast cancer for awhile now, doing chemo regularly, and yes, she lost her hair and now that it's grown back enough she's wearing short and sassy but obviously not coloring it. The fact that this happened is just sad and completely insensitive.

Is Walmart now requesting 2 forms of ID anytime someone has a different hair color or style from that on their drivers license or state ID? I highly doubt it and the fact that this happened to her is just heartbreaking!

I went to WalMart today to buy dog food & baby food for [my son]. I wrote a check & the cashier (KATHY!) asked for my driver's license. I handed it to her, she looked at it, then she looked at me and said "Wow!". I understood why, its because on my license I have long, straight, blonde hair. I now have a dark brown, chemo afro growing in! I explained to her I have cancer & my hair fell out. I was expecting her to say "Oh, I'm sorry." But instead she said "I will need another form of ID." I gave her my S.S.Card. She said "No, I need a picture ID". I told her my ID is from before I got married & has my old name on it, & I showed her a few credit cards too. She said "I need management approval". Are you freakin kidding me?! So the manager came over, I explained I have cancer & my hair fell out, thats why I dont look like me photo anymore, I also told her if Susan G. Komen found out about this it would be a media fire storm! Needless to say, she accepted my check & ID!

Working retail, I get the whole checking ID for accepting a check - at my job, anytime a check is written we do need to see a valid driver's license or state ID to process it as our computer needs the state issued ID number, expiration date and date of birth, as well as us just verifying that the name matches that on the check. We also check IDs if a person makes a purchase using a credit card and the back of the card is not signed so that we can match the name and signature. Unless it's an obvious thing, like a guy with a woman's ID and card, I don't usually worry about the photo, so long as the names match. But even if I did, there's other distinguishing features about a person's face aside from their hair color or style that you can tell if it's them or not!

People get their hair cut to different styles all the time, as well as coloring their hair - I know 1 girl who was dying her hair every other week as when her life gets a bit crazy, the color of her hair is one thing she can have control over. Yet, she's never seemed (or at least reported) having this problem!

My aunt said Audra posted a few days later that she had cooled down from the situation and has decided to just use cash whenever out shopping now, however she was very upset when it happened and for the rest of the day.

Cancer patients go through enough as it is, and while I understand not giving people special treatment, like I said, lots of people change their hair style and color all the time - unless Walmart is asking for 2 forms of photo ID for all people using checks but have a different hair color or cut from the time they got their ID photo taken, this just was very insensitive and it breaks my heart that this happened to her!

To a certain few - kindly STFU!

Today let's talk about 2 things: judgementalness when it comes to parenting and fast food.

Last week, as some of you may have noticed, @maliasma had tweeted about the grossness that is skim milk (no offense, if that's your preferred type of milk, but a lot of people do find it gross) and I tweeted back about how they now give you skim milk in the kid's meals at most fast food places when you opt for the milk instead of the juice box or soft drink. I also commented that my kiddo needs the fat in 2% and whole. Anyways, some jerk decided to butt in to our conversation, saying that I had no business giving my 1 year old fast food and that it's my responsibility as his parent to make healthy nutritional choices for him.

Um... did I ask for parenting advice? No.

He got rude after my response about not giving parenting advice when it isn't asked for and my question about if I should go ahead and carry unrefrigerated milk in my bag all day rather than buy it on the go when we're out and about, responding to my tweet about my sis coloring my hair saying "you obviously care more about your hair than your child's nutrition - grow up!" Um, excuse me - HOW are the 2 related? I was doing my sister a favor, as she needs like 1500 hours in the salon at beauty school to get her certification, my hair needed coloring before her wedding this weekend, I offered to come in during her walk-in hours so she'd get the credit and I'd get it done for cheap. WHAT does that have to do with my son's nutrition?

And I should clarify, it's not like I'm giving Jay fast food all the time - he's actually only had it twice that I can recall.

The 1st time, we were out at the mall one afternoon, mall-walking with my friend and her daughter, when it got past Jay's lunch time. He was clearly hungry, woofing down Goldfish crackers, so I stopped at Burger King and ordered him a kid's meal. I got him the chicken nuggets meal with milk - he ate 3 of the 4 nuggets, most of the milk and all of his applesauce cup I brought in my bag, I ate the fries and other nugget. This isn't any different than a typical lunch of his at home - he often eats chicken nuggets and applesauce for lunch with milk. The other occasion, we took a day-trip into the big mall in the suburbs and obviously he was going to need to eat at some point, so we stopped for lunch at A&W. He got the kid's hot dog meal with milk - I cut up his hot dog (which was vienna beef, so not a "junk" hot dog), a little bit of the bun, an applesauce cup I brought with and a good bit of the milk. I ate his fries with my own hot dog. Again, at home he often eats cut up Kosher hot dogs (yay for Hebrew National) with milk and applesauce for lunch. I don't see what's so wrong about either occasion. Sorry, but we're not an organic family however I do opt for more "natural" products and products that don't have high fructose corn syrup when I can. Sometimes while on the go though, it is easier to stop at a fast food joint and make sure my hungry kid gets fed. He gets 3 meals a day plus a snack here and there and a bottle of milk before bed.

Considering the rough start he had at the beginning - being as low as in the 5th percentile for growth - I am thrilled that at his last appointment he was in the 50th percentile and his growth is back on track. We let him eat until he's full or doesn't want anymore. At this point, portion control isn't an issue and we give him food we know he likes and will eat. If it's able to be finger food, that's even better as he enjoys feeding himself.

It irks me when someone butts in about my child's eating habits when they have NO IDEA what we've gone through in the beginning just to get him to eat ANYTHING and enough to grow. Now that he's growing fine and in the 50th percentile... I don't think his nutrition is an issue. If he starts getting obese obviously we'll fix whatever the issue is.

But my kid LOVES his applesauce. And his milk. And things that can be finger foods. Breakfast he eats oatmeal with fruit and fruit yogurt, lunch always contains a meat, chicken or some kind of protein and a fruit and sometimes a veggie, dinner is always a meat, a veggie and sometimes a fruit - all served with milk, occasionally water. So unless you know what I've been through - please kindly STFU.

And another thing that bugs me - the Breastfeeding Nazis.

Yes, we all know, breast is best, but sometimes circumstances arise that make moms end up formula feeding instead.

It's a personal choice and there's always a reason for why someone is formula feeding, so unless you know the whole story, quit judging.

If you've been reading this here blog for awhile, you know our story with breastfeeding.

Jay was induced roughly 2.5 weeks before his due date because of a significant lack in his growth between gestational weeks 30 and 37 - they were afraid he had stopped growing and there was no way of knowing why. So he was born at 37 weeks, 5 days old - technically full-term. He weighed 6lbs, 7oz - a full pound bigger than what the ultrasound 3 days prior had guessed. We had planned on exclusively breastfeeding him for at least 6 months.

God had other plans.

At his 1 week appointment, Jay had lost weight and was down to 6lbs even. At his 2 week appointment he was at 6lbs 8oz. The doctor gave us the weekend to see if he would gain any weight after we began supplementing with formula - that Monday he was still holding steady at 6lbs 8oz and was admitted to the pediatric unit at the hospital where he had numerous tests done trying to figure out why he wasn't eating enough to grow. He then spent the week hooked up to a feeding tube, continuously pumping formula into his stomach for several days straight. He began gaining weight and eating from a bottle.

By then we decided it was easier to just feed him from a bottle, with formula, so we could keep track of how much he was eating, making sure it was enough. Plus they put him on "high calorie" formula (Enfamil Lipil, mixed specially) to help him "catch up" a bit better and we had a visiting nurse checking up to weigh him twice a week to make sure he was continuing to gain weight after being discharged.

All the doctors and nurses we met with were behind our decision to formula feed 100% - they said that as long as we tried breastfeeding and Jay got all the good stuff in the colostrum, than really it was okay to formula feed, as the colostrum is really the important stuff they need - the rest from the breast is just extra, as formula these days is made pretty well.

But of course the Breastfeeding Nazis will be Breastfeeding Nazis - judging you for giving your kid formula, not having any idea what you've gone through just to get your kid to eat enough to grow (we did learn at my 6 week post-partum appointment that there was a knot in Jay's umbilical cord, which we believe is why he never knew the feeling of being full and eating only enough to survive). Whether it comes from a bottle or a breast, it doesn't matter - as long as your baby is healthy and eating, that's what matters.

So Breastfeeding Nazis, please kindly, STFU - it's not nice and just plain rude and hurtful when you get all judgmental on those mom's who aren't breastfeeding for one reason or another.

To wrap it up - what IS with Burger King not offering much of a healthy alternative? I mean McDonald's and Wendy's both have healthy-ish snackwraps - Burger King has salad that tastes like it's a day old despite saying "fresh" on the label. Get with it Burger King - I'd eat there more often if they had a decent tasting snackwrap... it actually saddens me that McDonald's was replaced by Burger King in our local mall (where I work, I might add), as there's nothing "good" to eat there.

Dear David's Bridal...

As I mentioned in my last post, my little sis is getting married in less than 5 weeks.

After having success in finding a wedding dress off the rack at our local David's Bridal, she picked out several bridesmaids dresses for me to come over that night and try one and pick out the one that looked and fit the best.

The sales lady that took over while I was there trying them on was absolutely NO HELP whatsoever.

I'm sure you may have seen my rant on Twitter last week... I swear, this place is the worst in town for wedding stuff as this is now my 2nd (out of 3) times I've had a bad experience with them. The 1st bad experience was when I was trying on gowns for my own wedding, roughly 4 years ago - I got a super pushy saleslady who kept pushing their heavily marketed dress on me that I knew wasn't "the one" and no matter how many times I told her I didn't think the dress was "it" she still kept insisting on this and that and then proceeded to deck me out in their overpriced accessories that I told her I wasn't buying there either! The woman refused to listen to what I was saying and we eventually left and bought a dress at a smaller, local boutique that I tried on earlier in the day and loved!

This time though... as I said, my sis picked out a few styles for bridesmaid dresses that she wouldn't mind us wearing and wanted me to go with my mom to start trying them on and ruling some out as she was finishing up picking out tuxes and would meet us shortly. Out of the 3 she had picked out, only 1 really seemed to work best (the 1st looked too old lady-ish, and the 3rd was just too tight in the thighs, even when I went up a size). So we go with the 2nd which looked pretty good and go to order them in the color she wanted and the size.

The initial girl that had been helping us up to this point was great and very sweet!

But when we went to order, this older lady took over... and my what a bitch she turned into!

She tells us that this particular dress is discontinued and she can't find it in my size in ANY store. So we ask her if she can tell us which dresses aren't discontinued so we're not wasting our time trying ones on and picking ones that end up being discontinued. She says she doesn't know what dresses are discontinued until she pulls them up on the computer. She points us to the poster with various styles on it and tells us that ones that aren't on sale most likely aren't discontinued and we'd have better luck, but then she goes on to say that the color my sis has chosen is a popular one and we might want to pick a different color. I remind her that I'm only a bridesmaid, not the bride, so that's not my decision to make. Then she starts going on about how 5 weeks is too soon, not enough time to ensure they'll be here with enough time for alterations, etc... um yeah, again, I'm not the bride, what does she expect me to do about it? Bitching to me about the wedding date being so soon isn't my fault!

Frankly, I got sick of her bitchy and condescending attitude she was taking with us.  It was very rude and unwarranted - we were being completely cooperative and understanding of the fact that yes, the color we need is a popular one and yes, we understand the wedding date is very soon. Why she was taking a bitchy and condescending tone with us is beyond me, and was very off-putting.

Jay was with us, as we had hoped to have him try on some baby tuxes that night, so I used his fussing as my excuse to go outside, motioning for my mom to follow me. I told her I really wasn't appreciating the attitude this woman was giving us for no apparent reason and how I would really rather not do business with her. I suggested we go out to the mall and look at formal dresses in the department store there and see if we can't find something that'll work. She agreed and went back in to let them know we would be leaving, apologizing if we were being an inconvenience to anyone.

We found one that might work out at the mall, but decided to look online that night and see if we couldn't find something. Out of sheer curiosity, I went on David's Bridal's website just to see what they had that was available (since the lady was no help with that) and lo and behold! There's the dress that she told us was discontinued! They had all the sizes in it, in the color we needed, except for my size, but my mom said I could easily go up a size and she could just take it in for me, as they had the next size available (something the woman in the store didn't even suggest we do or offer to check!).

We promptly ordered them and guess what! The dresses arrived 5 days later! And the lady claimed we would be cutting it too close to the wedding date... pfft!

My mom and sis are half tempted to go in with one of the dresses and show the lady that "hey look! We got the dresses! In the color and sizes you said we couldn't get them in! And they already arrived!"

I told them I totally would - rub it in her face that her bad attitude cost her a commission (as we would have been purchasing all 4 bridesmaid dresses at once).

So yeah, there's my little David's Bridal rant.

I've only shopped at one other location, with my experience there being neither great nor bad, but our local store, here in Rockford... the customer service for me personally has been terrible 2 out of 3 times now. That's unacceptable.

If you do shop with this company, I recommend trying on in the store, getting your sizes and then ordering online. So much hassle-free ordering off their website!

**edit**
I JUST looked on their site to get an image of the dress and... it's now available in my size and color! Um... if a dress is discontinued why are they getting more sizes in??? Discontinued my ass...

Jay's 1 year check-up!

OMG, 3 posts in 1 day!

Oh well, whatever, lol...

On Monday we had Jay's 1 year check-up and oh my gosh that was THE LONGEST hour and a half EVER!

His appointment was at 130, but ever since he started walking I have to chase him around the house when it's time to go, so we were about 5 minutes late, but there were only 2 other sets of people in the waiting room, both in wheelchairs I might add, which piqued Jay's curiosity (especially the one guy with the helmet who was somewhat mentally handicapped - Jay kept starring as he played with the toys in the corner, doh!).

So after about 5-10 minutes in the waiting room they take us back, checking Jay's weight along the way.

Apparently he only weighs 22lbs, 12oz  (just under a 2lb gain from his 10 month weigh-in), which is in the 50th percentile although everyone swears he feels like he's at least 25lbs!

Height-wise, he is 30 1/2 inches long, which puts him in the 70th percentile, so they said he's a little on the tall side, which isn't a surprise to anyone, considering his daddy is 6'3" with siblings all around 6ft or taller. Remember the big deal they made before his birth about his femurs measuring small? Yeah, he's just torso-tall like we all figured he would be!

His head measures 46cm, so he's 50th percentile there too!

After they took all his measurements and checked his vitals they had us weight for what felt like a good 15-20 minutes before the doctor came in. And you would think for being a family practice that they would have better baby/child-proofed the exam rooms! I was literally chasing Jay all over the room as he wanted to play in the drawers and cabinets, then the non-biohazard trashcan, and the spinny stool, and then climbing on the exam table and licking the base of the floor lamp and then the chairs... it was tiring! I was about to ask if we could just go sit back in the waiting room until he was ready for us, that way Jay could play with the toys out there and not be getting into everything - I think I might do that next time!

Finally the doctor came in and said everything looks good - he was glad to hear Jay was switched over to table foods and whole milk and drinking from a sippy some. He was impressed to see him walking around too.

This visit also included some shots, including the MMR (Measles, Mumps and Ruebella), Hepatitis-A and the Varicella (Chickenpox) vaccine.

We opted not to do the Chickenpox vaccine, which our doctor was fine with, as he said it is a newer one and we have the final say when it comes to vaccines, however he did give us a paper that talked about the vaccine and why they recommend it. Honestly though, hubby and I both think it's a bit ridiculous that they're vaccinating against the Chickenpox now - growing up, as a kid, getting the Chickenpox was a rite of passage and just a part of childhood; when one kid on my block got it our parents all sent us to go play with them in hopes that we'd get it and get it over with it. Now, from what our doctor told me and what we read on the sheet he sent home, it sounds like it's a matter of convenience - the kids don't have to miss school and suffer all the the symptoms of it, parents don't have to miss work... (which for us isn't a big deal as I'm only part-time and my mom watches him when I can't). Since when do we vaccine just because it's convenient? Vaccinating for Chickenpox is just dumb and unnecessary in my opinion - most people got it as a kid and turned out just fine. Sure, there's the rare case of a kid dying, but you take that risk with everything in life. I'd rather not vaccinate against something as unnecessary as the Chickenpox. A friend of mine doesn't vaccinate for personal reasons (she has a brother with severe autism which developed when he was a child so obviously that plays a role in her decision), so I think when her kids get the Chickenpox I'll see if I can bring Jay over and let him play with them so that he can get it and get it over with.

So that's my take on that.

After the doctor left we had to wait another 5-10 minutes for the nurse to come in to give Jay his shots.

He was NOT happy and refused to way goodbye to her, and then gave her a cautious look when we ran into her on our way out. All the shots and bloodwork he's had this past year, you'd think I'd be used to see him get stuck, but for some reason this time made me feel sad. Probably because he knew it was coming when he saw the nurse come in (she's been the one doing his shots the last few times we've been there) and when we laid him down on the exam table.

He survived though and he seems to be doing fine. I've been keeping an eye on him, just because the MMR vaccine is the one that was linked to the autism controversy awhile back. Granted, the way I see it, if it's God's will for Jay to have autism, he'll have it regardless, vaccine or no vaccine.

We had to wait to schedule his next appointment, as there was only 1 lady working the desk and there was a line. Luckily we were back in the waiting room though so I let Jay go play with the toys in the corner of the room and that kept him occupied.

Thursday is our trip up to Milwaukee to visit his pediatric urology specialist. This is our first time visiting him at his new location, so hopefully we don't get lost! Hubby is taking the day off work and coming with us since he has to go in this Saturday, so I'm excited about that - he never gets to come to doctor appointments with us and given this exam, I could use the extra help keeping Jay out of things!

Tebow, Tebow, Tebow

Warning - this is a bit of a sports rant.

Whether you watch football or not, I'm sure by now most of you have heard of the Denver Broncos quarterback Tim Tebow or at least the latest internet crazy of taking random pictures of yourself in various poses known as "Tebowing." The guy is fairly young, an out-spoken Christian, and supposedly a good guy all around.

And the media seems to have a huge love affair with the guy.

Now, don't get me wrong - I'm not a "Tebow Hater." Honestly, I don't know much about the guy as he's not on my team (The Cowboys) so I could really care less about him and I don't really have an opinion on him.

But what I CAN'T stand is this crazy media love affair. They're like obsessed with the guy!

I swear, I can't turn on ESPN or even watch the recaps and highlights of other games between the games on Sundays without hearing them CONSTANTLY mention Tebow's name at every chance they get.

I kid you not.

Here's a perfect example:
This evening, before the big Sunday Night Football game, we were watching the recaps and highlights of the afternoon and they got to the Patriots game. Apparently some guy on one of the 2 teams that was playing in that game played in college with Tebow... So OF COURSE they HAD to mention Tebow when he had NOTHING to do with the game they were recapping!

DRIVES ME NUTS!

I told hubby that one of these days I'm going to start taking shots everytime we're watching something football-related and they say the name "Tebow." Hubby said I'd be drunk quite quickly!

I just don't get it though - WHY??? Why is the media so in love with this guy?

I hear he's not even that great - I mean hello, his team is what, 6-5 or something like that now? All the good teams this season are at least 7-3 or better.

If it was Aaron Rodgers and The Packers they were constantly going on about, okay, sure I can understand that as The Packers are currently the only undefeated team this season (although they have had an easy season so far!). But it's the freakin' Denver Broncos!

I just don't get it.

"What kind of name is 'Stove' anyway?"

I got a bit of a complaint, everyone.

This past weekend hubby and I rented the movie Bridesmaids. And it wasn't as funny as everyone made it out to be.

I had been wanting to see this one since it was in theaters, as it was made to sound like it was the female version of "The Hangover" (which was hilarious!). Hubby had no interest in it though as hello, it's a movie about a group of bridesmaids.

Ever since though, I've heard person after person, from relatives to co-workers to some of you in Blogland and the Twitterverse, talk about how funny and hilarious it was... after weeks of suggesting it, I finally talked him into us renting it and watching it together.

And I was sadly disappointed.

There were some funny parts - the part where they're trying on the dresses, the entire scene on the plane, the bridal shower and the part where she's hanging out with the cop or trying to get his attention.

Melissa McCarthy was quite funny though (as expected) and while Kristin Wiig was funny at times, I think I prefer her more as a supporting actress rather than a lead.

But the rest of the movie was just slow, and boring... it honestly didn't get funny til a good 30-45 minutes in - the first part was just dragging and we were both getting a bit bored, but I kept hoping it would get better. I mean, everyone said it was hilarious! Best movie of the year! Just as funny as The Hangover if not funnier!

Yeah... no.

Considering Judd Apatow was involved as well as Paul Feig (I mean c'mon - their show Freaks and Geeks was and is one of my absolute favorite TV shows!), I know what to expect. However this wasn't it. In comparison to other films Apatow's been involved in, I'd rank it up there with Funny People, which was also a disappointment. While it was funny at times, it dragged on quite a bit and at times I found myself bored.

So yeah... Bridesmaids.

I'd say it's worth watching it once, so you can say you saw it and decide for your own, but for me, I was a bit disappointed as it didn't live up to all the hype I had heard from almost anyone and everyone.

Why Bother Calling It Black Friday Anymore?

Earlier tonight, while Jay was taking one of his super long naps he's been taking lately (we think he's going through a growth spurt as he seems fine, just super tired!), I decided to get online and check out the leaked Black Friday ads for next week as I'm going shopping tomorrow (yay payday!) and was wondering if I should wait on picking a few things up.

Anyways, I was a bit shocked.

Last year, most places opened at 4am. This year, midnight seems to be the norm.

However, Toys R Us and Walmart both have their sales starting at 9pm Thursday - THURSDAY!

Pardon me, but WTF???

You can't call your sales Black Friday sales when it's on Thanksgiving Thursday - that doesn't make any sense!

Yes, I know they opened at like 10pm last year, which I thought was a bit crazy too (but then again, last year we were the crazy ones outside Target in the freezing cold for 4 hours straight, me being almost 8 months pregnant, lol...).

But still... each year they seem to just be opening earlier and earlier... before you know it the stores will be open most of the day on Thanksgiving with the sales starting then...

Oh wait, Kmart already does that.

Yes, that's correct - Kmart is open for most of Thanksgiving with various sales going on.

Seriously.

I feel bad for the employees who basically have to skip Thanksgiving and having any time with family on the holiday all in the name of consumerism and corporate greed.

I know, nurses, doctors and other emergency and service people have to work or on-call, but they knew that when they decided to go into the profession. Most people that work retail can remember the days when stores weren't open on major holidays - Thanksgiving being one of them.

And I know personally it sucks - working at a movie theater, we're open 365 days a year so people can have their family traditions of going to see a movie together after Thanksgiving dinner or after they open the presents on Christmas... however we did have shortened hours, so we could have a chance to spend at least part of the day with our families (I usually took the closing shifts that started at 6pm so we could do an early, 4pm dinner).

This year we're one of several stores in the mall that are opening at midnight (although really, who's crazy enough about kid's clothes to come out at midnight for them?? We're not expecting to get busy until the rest of the mall opens hours later). Fortunately for me though, the acting store manager requested me as her closer again this year so I get the more relaxed shift as last year the crowd at the mall seemed to die down a lot after 4pm.

What are your thoughts?

Honestly, I think it's almost like they're trying to overrun Thanksgiving with consumerism and greed, making it obsolete and giving people little to no time to celebrate. And that's just sad!

Thoughts on the recent Penn State scandal

Penn State has been in the news a lot lately the past week or so.

Penn State is a bit important to me as my parents met while both attending college there (both my parents were born and raised near the Pittsburgh area - Uniontown & Brownsville to be exact), so we're part of the Penn State family. Growing up, my parents would often wear their college sweatshirts on the weekends, watching the football games on Saturdays while doing other things around the house. I even remember constantly getting in their bedroom closet to play with their Nittany Lion plush (mom didn't want me to mess it up so she would put it up, out of reach... or so she thought!).

I didn't really hear or look into what happened until late last week when I heard about Joe Paterno getting fired and riots happening... something having to do with sexual abuse of children. Trying to figure out what exactly happened, why people were upset or defending Paterno and in order to form an opinion of my own I went searching online and came across an article that included the 23 page grand jury report of what all happened, naming a handful of others that knew of Sandusky's inappropriate and sick behavior.

To brief you (if you were lost and didn't hear about the scandal til later like I did and only heard people going on about Paterno and not really discussing what actually happened):

• The former Penn State defensive coordinator Jerry Sandusky hosted a program at the university for underprivileged boys called Second Mile in the '90s and 2000s. There's recently been 8 victims that have come forward saying Sandusky physically sexually abused them, some even saying it went as far as rape, when they were teens and preteens who met Sandusky while participating in the program.
  
• One of the more extreme incidents that occurred in the locker room showers in 2002 was witnessed by assistant PSU football coach Mike McQueary who was a graduate assistant at the time. McQueary returned to the locker rooms one evening to put away a pair of shoes and grab some recruiting films to take back to his office when he heard something going on in the showers, where he witnessed Sandusky doing "something of sexual nature" with a young boy. Despite Sandusky and the boy seeing him, McQueary turned away and left, doing nothing to stop it.
  
• McQueary did however return to his office and call his father and informed head coach Joe Paterno of what he saw. Not having witnessed it himself, Paterno followed protocal and reported it to PSU athletic director Tim Curley. Curley and the Sr. VP for Finance and Business Gary Schultz then met with McQueary to discuss what he saw. It's reported that Curley and Schultz did tell the PSU president Graham Spanier, however it's been said that Spanier was only told that Sandusky was just "horsing around" with a boy in the showers, not that he was sexually taking advantage of a child.

Honestly, I think Joe Paterno is the least of the people that should be held accountable here - if anything he was simply a messenger or a middleman. To him it was hearsay and from reading about it, he was following protocol/policy.

McQueary and Paterno

McQueary was the one that witnessed it, could have stopped it and taken the boy to safety and report it to the police himself. If anyone should have followed up on it, it should have been McQueary as Schultz and Curley had met with him - all Paterno did was inform the necessary PSU authority that there might be a situation, that one of his staff claimed to have witnessed Sandusky doing something inappropriate, and put them in touch with McQueary so they could begin an investigation. It was out of his hands, I see him as simply being the messenger here. Sure, he could have followed up, but again, to him it was just hearsay; McQueary was the one who actually witnessed it and should have done more.

Think about it, if you inform the necessary authorities as per protocol/policy about a serious situation, you most likely would assume that they would do their part/job. If you had only heard about the situation and still saw the person in question around wouldn't you most likely assume that nothing came of the investigation? However, if you actually did witness something such as McQueary did and still saw the person around wouldn't you question what was going on and why no punishment was carried out?

And while it doesn't excuse anything, we do have to remember that Paterno is an older man, from the older generation who often believes that your word is your bond - if you say you're going to do something, that means you're going to do it. He most likely believed that Curley would take care of the situation like he was supposed to (and most likely told Joe he would), and he probably, honestly thought nothing came of it. I know if it was me, I probably would have made the same assumption - that nothing came of the investigation and that McQueary was mistaken about what he said he saw.

If anyone should have gotten fired right away, I would think it would be McQueary, Curley and Schultz for dropping the ball and not making more of an effort. Thankfully, Curley and Schultz have been charged with perjury, as their stories didn't match up and clearly they didn't take McQueary seriously as they told the PSU president Sandusky was only seen "horsing around" with a boy in the showers. McQueary should have followed up with Schultz and Curley though and he should have tried to help the boy rather than walking away. From what we know, Paterno's involvement was just that he was a messenger. And you know the saying - you don't shoot the messenger.

And that poor child... in the grand jury report, all the victims say they became uncomfortable with Sandusky. This one, to have seen McQueary walk in... I can only imagine the relief he felt, in hoping that here, someone would help and put a stop to Sandusky and then the despair when he saw McQueary do nothing and just simply walk away instead.

Being a mother of a boy... stuff like this scares me. Eventually he's going to want to do programs or join clubs similar to Second Mile (whether it be Boy Scouts, sports, whatever) where adults are trusted to supervisor the kids and protect them, not take advantage of them. Many of the victims said things with Sandusky started out innocent - dinner over at his house with his family, joining him for professional sporting games nearby with a few other kids... things you would think you could be okay with your child joining a trusted coach or mentor to do. But unfortunately some adults you think you can trust are just sick. And that scares me.

If they're cleaning house at PSU of anyone who had any knowledge or involvement of what happened, that's fine and understandable. However I feel it's quite unfair for them to single out Paterno like he has been when to him it was just hearsay and he was just following protocol being the messenger.

What are your thoughts?

Glee: Did they go too far this week?

So apparently I hear there's been quite an uproar about this week's episode of Glee.

This week's episode, I'll admit, was quite sexually charged compared to the majority of the episodes.

(spoiler alert - stop reading now if you haven't seen the episode yet and plan on doing so!)

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This week was the big school musical of West Side Story that's been the focus of the show the past few episodes. While rehearsing a number as Tony and Maria, student director Artie feels Rachel and Blaine are lacking the sexual passion of the song and inquiries about their 1st times (both however are virgins, as are faculty co-directors Guidance Counselor Emma and Coach Beast). So the focus of the episode becomes Rachel deciding whether or not to sleep with her boyfriend Finn; Blaine and Kurt deciding whether or not to make their relationship sexual; and getting the man-ish Coach Beast to finally accept a date from an attractive college recruiter she's liked for years but felt she wasn't pretty enough for.

The Coach Beast storyline was humorous and sweet - when the attractive  recruiter finally asked her one last time (at the suggestion of Artie) she finally broke down and explained how she felt a guy like him could never be interested in a woman like her - he's the type of guy that could have any pretty girl he wanted. He told her he wasn't interested in pretty girls, but rather pretty women like her (despite her man-ish appearance which has caused her a lot of pain in life, she does seem to have a genuinely good heart).

The other storylines are what people are upset about.

Well, at first Rachel decides to sleep with Finn so it would help her with the musical number, which when Finn finds out, upsets him (obviously). Trying to figure out why she wants to do it, she pulls together the other Glee members and asks about their first experiences with sex. Santana, Brittany and Quinn all tell her to wait, which sounds good to her... until Tina tells what a great experience her 1st time was with someone she loves.

With Kurt and Blaine... when Blaine visits his former show choir, the Dalton Warblers, to give them tickets to the musical, his replacement, another gay male named Sebastian, shows an interest in him. They meet up a few times just to talk, including at the coffee shop where they run into Kurt he begins to get jealous. Wanting to live a little and be a bit more adventurous with their relationship (as per a prior conversation they had in Blaine's room), Kurt accepts Sebastian's invite for them to join him at the local gay bar for dancing. Kurt stays sober while Sebastian gets Blaine drunk and in the parking lot Blaine physically tries to get Kurt to have sex with him, despite their prior discussion on waiting. Upset at the fact that Blaine just spent half the night dancing with Sebastian he tells him no and Blaine walks home. Later though, they make-up.

The episode ends with both Rachel and Finn and Kurt and Blaine in bed together (respectively that is, not all 4 together), on the verge of having sex.

People are in an uproar apparently about how the episode seemed to focus on teenage sex and specifically gay sex.

Honestly, they didn't show anything more than they hadn't already. There was no nudity from the shoulders down and all we saw was the prelude to implied sex. Yes, they were teenagers. But hello, this is Glee - when has this show not had implied teenage sex? They've mentioned Puck is basically a manwhore who is known for hooking up with the cougars whose pools he cleans (not to mention in the previous episode he shares a kiss with a teacher). The whole 1st season dealt with Quinn's pregnancy as a result of Puck getting her drunk one night. We've seen Brittney and Artie before and after sex. And how many times have we seen Mr. Shue getting with the ladies before the screen cuts out and it's implied he's slept with them?

And for the whole gay sex uproar... am I the only one that remembers the Brittney/Santana fling last season where they were in bed together, obviously just having finished doing something...? There was a whole episode devoted to Santana deciding she was a closet lesbian and upset that Brittney (who's apparently bi) chose Artie over her.

I'm not going to get into the topic of thoughts on homosexuality, but as far as Glee goes, this week's episode was nothing new.

Yes, like I said, it was sexually charged moreso than the majority of the episodes, but so was the Rocky Horror special last fall (Emma singing "Touch-a, Touch-a, Touch Me" to Mr. Shue ring a bell, anyone?) and I'm sure there's been a few other episodes that were quite heavy on the topic of sex.

While I know there are families who watch Glee together for the musical aspect of the show, let's face it, it's a dramedy, not a musical. The drama is what fuels the show and keeps us coming back for more each week - not the tunes. Yes, the singing is a neat aspect to it that many enjoy. But it is not a show for kids.

The majority of the characters on the show have had storylines involving sex. Like I said, one major storyline during the 1st season was all about Puck knocking up Quinn and her making Finn think he was the father til she fessed up. Mr. Shue and Emma have always had major sexual tension that seems to come and go. Plus, post-divorce, 2nd season Mr. Shue seemed to get around quite a bit.

So honestly, I don't get what everyone is in a tizzy about - the topic of sex and teenage sex is nothing new on Glee and in this week's episode, while it was implied, nothing was actually shown that hasn't already been seen on TV.

What are your thoughts? 

 Did they go to far or do you think everyone just has their panties in a bunch over nothing new?

Don't forget to enter in my Bath & Body Works Holiday Fragrance Giveaway!!!

You have til 10pm CST on Monday to enter!

Dryer Despairs

This past weekend our not quite 6 month old dryer seems to have stopped working properly as it won't heat up to dry anything! It goes through the normal cycles of drying the clothes... but with no heat!

We're not entirely sure what happened to have caused this or when it exactly it started happening - hubby was sick for a few days last week, and me not wanting to catch it for fear of knowing that if I get sick it's pretty much a guarantee that Jay will get sick also decided to sleep on the couch for a few nights and wash all the sheets and bedding once hubby was feeling better.The comforter didn't dry 100% after 2 cycles, but that's normal as it's so big anyway so I didn't think too much about that.

Friday we bought a heavy blanket to use for nights when the comforter is too warm, but it's too cold to sleep without a blanket. We bought it at Walmart though and it didn't come in any protective wrapping so we wanted to wash it first before using. I put it in Saturday and it didn't dry all the way the 1st time so I put it in again and put Jay's clothes (including all his heavier, outdoor pants) in the wash and went to bed while hubby stayed up playing Madden (I was dead tired for some reason), telling him to put Jay's clothes in the dryer before he came to bed.

He did and brought the mostly dry blanket upstairs with him.

Sunday afternoon, as we're getting ready to go to the Apple Orchard, I go to get Jay's clothes out of the dryer as the outfit I wanted to put on him (plus all his pants!) was in there... and his clothes are still soaked as if the dryer never ran!

Wtf??

Hubby swore he ran the dryer before he went to bed.

Confused, I checked to make sure it was on the automatic, energy saving preferred setting and went back upstairs to get myself ready to go. I check back in 20 minutes, as it's on the cooldown cycle... and Jay's clothes are still soaked!

We ran the dryer 2 more times, once on the high heat setting just to be sure and still, nothing!

I called my parents and asked my dad if he knew anything about gas dryers, so he came over to check the pilot light for us, which seemed fine... and we had previously followed the troubleshooting instructions in the manual (which were simply make sure the lint trap was empty and that the gas valve to the dryer was open - duh!).

I called Lowe's service number on Monday to see about them sending a repairman out, since it's not even 6 months old and still under the manufacturer's warranty. Since I'm on-call at work in the afternoon this week on Tuesday and Wednesday I opted for a morning appointment on Wednesday - they gave me a window of 8am-noon for someone to be out here.

Needless to say, I waited around for a good bit this morning and this afternoon.

Noon came and went. I waited til 1230 before calling the number again, figuring maybe the tech was running behind or something. By 1245 I finally got a hold of a representative and explained that it was well past noon and the time frame I was given and that I might have to leave for work in 45 minutes and that no one had been to our house yet or even called! He put me on hold and called the tech to find out what was going on, explaining to him that I might have to leave soon. I was told that the tech was in the middle of a dishwasher installation and would try to make it over to our house before I would have to leave to at least diagnose the situation but if he didn't make I would have to call and reschedule.

Well, fortunately they didn't need my on-call at work so I didn't have to go in til later, but 130 came and went and no repairman.

I did get a call later today from American (which is guess is who Lowe's goes through for their major appliance repairs...?) saying I need to call them to reschedule my appointment as they understood I had to leave and the tech didn't get out here in time.

Grrr... add that on my list of things to do now... again.

I really hope we get our dryer fixed by the weekend and that they're not booked into next week now. Fortunately my parents only live 5-10minutes away so we could always use their dryer if we need to (we ended up sending Jay's laundry home with them and stopping by later to dress him and get them before we went to the Apple Orchard).

So annoying though!

Blasting your music while driving PSA

I know when it's really nice out people tend to drive with their windows down (or if you're like me and have no AC in your car you drive with them all down when it's super hot out!). And I know that when you're driving with the windows down you need to turn your music up a bit to hear it over the traffic.

But PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE make sure you're not blasting something that most people with a brain or little kids in the backseat would find horribly offensive.

Case in point:
I was out with Jay the other day, the weather was in the mid-70s and we were driving home. I also had my window down as we drove. As we pull up to a stoplight we get stuck sitting next to some guys who looked like they were trying to be Lil Wayne and were BLASTING some terrible, terrible rap song. I didn't understand much of it, but the lyrics I did hear and understand included repeat uses of the "N-word", as well as f*ck, sh*t and there was some talk about "eating p*ssy".

Is that REALLY appropriate to be blasting out of your car speakers??? I mean seriously!

I would have rolled up my window, however as loud as the guys had it, I really doubt it would have made much of a difference as my windows aren't sound proof/resistant/whatever.

While I'm not easily offended, I admit, I was annoyed about it. However I'm just glad Jay isn't old enough to understand any what was being played nor did he really seem to notice it. But for little kids somewhat older than him...? I would have been horrified!

"Mommy... why do they want to eat the pussycat? And what's a n*****?"

Yeah, try explaining that to your little kid who wants to know about anything and everything.

Sure, kids will be exposed to that stuff at some point - you can't shelter them forever - but you do want them to keep a bit of innocence until they're at least old enough to understand that certain things shouldn't be repeated and that some things are a bit inappropriate for public settings.

Twitter Etiquette PSA

No one likes spoilers, especially ones pertaining to show finales or major plot twists in a movie.

Now I understand it's fun to "live tweet" while watching your favorite show and sharing your thoughts on events as they happen, but do you think it's really appropriate to tweet to all ~475 who just died on the show as it's airing in the east coast and central time zones?

This happened last night as the True Blood season finale was airing during the same time as Sunday Night Football. Because the TV that's hooked up to the box that gives us access to HBO is also our HDTV and that particular cable box is also the HD box obviously football took precedence (not to mention I wouldn't want to miss the game - watching sports after you already know who won isn't fun and kinda pointless). Another Twitter friend was also in the same boat as me, although she was recording True Blood during the game to watch afterwards.

I suppose I could have ignored Twitter, however there were several of us Cowboys fan and Jets fans tweeting back and forth with each other during the game, getting a little competition going on.

Yes, spoilers happen,  but I'm pretty sure it's a common courtesy that if you're on the east coast, don't give out spoilers until after the west coast has had a chance to watch it, otherwise, in my opinion, that's just rude - sure, I had the opportunity to watch it as it 1st aired, however people on the west coast don't so when you (on the east coast or in the central timezone) tweet major spoilers (such as who all died and made cameos in the episode) it totally ruins the show/finale/episode for those on the west coast.

I wouldn't be as annoyed if it was hours after the premiere or even the next day as by then most people have had an opportunity (whether they took it or not) to see it, but tweeting spoilers during the 1st broadcast... that's just rude and you deserve the unfollows that you received (especially since you continued after it was pointed out you were giving spoilers away to everyone unable to watch that particular broadcast!).

Same goes for movies and books - please don't blurt out who dies or what the major plot twist is in a book or movie where someone who hasn't seen/read it and maybe wants to can hear you. It totally ruins the excitement of what you were looking forward to.

If you must live tweet during a show you can do so without giving away spoilers, like "Omg! I can't believe that just happened to so and so!!!" leaving out what exactly it was that happened. When I watched the Game of Thrones season finale I did make a "Zomg! Dragons!!" tweet but unless you read the books, you wouldn't really know what exactly I was referring to or why I said dragons or where the dragons came from, etc. Be vague if you need to share, but don't spoil.